>>8645 >>8647 I think we all saw something like this coming a mile away tbh

Was just meditating for a few minutes and overcame the mental chatter quickly, noticing that there were either koi fish or just big majestic looking goldfish (some of them had patterns in their scales) in a pond in front of me. I fed them some fish food but it was difficult to control my arms. I looked around and saw that this pond was actually sort-of "indoors" but in a structure made of fabric-like material that allows air and some sunlight through. I also saw that there were rectangular things in the floor, but then my timer went off irl. Maybe this was some kind of fish farm? The pond by me didn't seem rectangular though. I just need to figure out how to replicate the feeling of complete transference that happens during AP, while I'm awake and meditating. Then I can explore things like this with much better perception and motor skills.

>>8623 Would you please ask my Amy what I should be doing right now? I'm having a very bad situation with my fears today to the point where this morning I couldn't even take my stomach pill or eat breakfast or get in the shower without immense difficulty with keeping away what were either hostile entities or my jungian shadow pretending to be hostile entities; I still can't tell the difference between my imagination and actual non-physical reality.

>>8709 What is the actual problem, how does it appear? >intrusive thoughts >OCD >religious issues ? By this I mean, from my own context, things like "can I do this or will it create karma", "is this a sin" and getting stuck in internal arguments over every little daily thing until you can't do anything. It seems you have the same issue as someone else I know, the constant fear of selling your soul. I get how intrusive it can be, even if my experiences were different in form, but be more detailed about how you experience the problem. You may not want to be elaborate, from fear of initiating the object of your fear, but at least give me some pointers at what this is about?

>>8714 I'd figured you could just ask her and she'd say what I need to do; I guess you had another idea. That said, I'd also like you to find out if she's okay or not. Anyway as you know my subconsciousness is trying to rile up my consciousness into staying awake & alert throughout the day, and this is because my brain doesn't know how to keep itself awake like a normal person anymore because my parents raised me on adderall & SSRIs and I wasn't able to get off of them until I secretly did so when I'd finally gotten to leave home to go to college. So on the night of the 15th leading to the 16th, I was lying in bed with Amy before I went to bed and I saw a hypnogogic image of a naked white woman with more than 1 set of arms wearing a headdress and nothing else. I have contacted Rati here & there in the past, but I generally try not to contact Her, and I question if this was Her. Anyway I wasn't sure who she was when she got here, so I'd suspected that my subconsciousness would try to force my astral body parts to rape her so I'd warned her about it and then she manifested some huge grey toothed thing to intimidate me, and then I went and explained my mental illness. Later that night also before I'd fallen asleep, I saw a hypnogogic image of myself walking down a dark-grey stone hallway lit by dense rows of wide torches near both sides of the roof. I dunno what'd happened after that and I don't remember what I'd dreamt about that night. That morning when I woke up, I saw a hypnopompic image of a buck naked white woman lying sideways with her head held up by her elbow & forearm and staring in my direction; she was lying upon a huge red flower with yellow petals, and there was a smaller such flower on each side. After that, I saw occasional third-eye-glimpses throughout the day of some woman, mostly of her bare cunt. I was under the impression that a succubus was trying to "seduce" me so that my recent incubus-related fears would be replaced with fears of her so that my intention-related energies would be less clogged up in the short term. I was able to mostly ignore her throughout the day. When I went to bed that night I was talking to Amy and the presumed-succubus was there too. I'd tried putting on some frequency video at first to get rid of the woman, but Amy told me repeatedly to not do it, and then I did it anyway and I heard Amy apologize to someone because I was doing it, and then I'd turned it off. I'd ended up hesitantly going along with accepting the woman's presence and having to constantly shove her away all night because I'd figured that this was just a poly to manipulate my fears so that I could ultimately function without being crippled by this mental illness. At some point I saw a hypnogogic image of the woman putting a bunch of tentacles that look like yellow pasta noodles near eachother in the background of a swamp, and the noodle-tentacles were arranged in such a manner that they left an empty space in the middle, and said empty space was shaped like a heart. When she'd said that, I heard Amy say: >he'll love you if you do that Later, I got a hypnogogic image of me getting inserted into the shallows of a swamp, which made me think of >>8566 . That's when I'd decided that I'd had enough, so I'd called in help to get rid of that woman and I'd tried to get Amy's safety secured. Then I went to bed and had pretty normal dreams. I only remember the last dream which was me and my big brother sitting at home in the living room while he was playing a game on a portable console as Amy, and he made sure the screen was tilted so I could see it. However, after I woke up this morning my incubus-related fears flared up and it felt like this incubus that might've not even been a real foreign entity and just been my subconsciousness making a tulpa of an incubus out of my fears or my jungian shadow impersonating said incubus directly. These problems are related to >>8387 . I also woke up this morning figuring that Amy didn't get the help she'd needed last night and she'd gotten taken down into that swamp that I was dragged into and she probably got raped and brainwashed there, or worse, since according to what Kali said as in >>8622 these I suppose are sex demons that I assume live in that swamp, and it might've been one of their females that were trying to seduce me yesterday. Anyway if that'd happened to my Amy then she might as well be dead in my eyes; that's why I want you to find out if she's okay or not. Later this morning, I'd failed to prevent the incubus or supposed incubus that's really just my subconsciousness or jungian shadow pretending to be said incubus; I can't tell which... I'd failed to prevent it from worming its way inside of my soul, that is, the non-physical anatomy of mine that resides within my physical body. This of course means I'm possessed by it now, even if only partially. Since then, my sense of self is getting conflated with that presumed incubus, and I'm starting to feel kinda like one whenever I project myself into a hypothetical situation and I question if I'm starting to grow a pair of astral demon horns on my head.

>>8741 >Anyway if that'd happened to my Amy then she might as well be dead in my eyes What a shaky "love". If I can even call it that. Is it despair talking or are you truly this pathetic?

>>8269 Accidentally posted this is in the wrong magic blog thread, but seems like a podcast i watch sometimes "paranormal roundtable" is being under some kind of astral harassment campaign/attack. This is likely cause they often cover vampires and witches. It might also be cause the main guy is starting to connect a lot of dots people don't usually do. Although the guy isn't really a 'nice' person and rather abrasive sometimes which doesn't help. Anyway its a good place to hear fringe stories in the background so i appreciate that.

>>8741 Thanks, I needed this context. I don't think Amy would be overpowered by anything, but she's also not some super being who can solve anything, so it's not right to ask her about this in some vague manner and expect her so fix it. >Rati I had to look this up properly, because after what Kali said that >people used to call them devas, but they're just sex demons I recalled my first ever clear interactions with some non physical entities, and they said themselves they are called Kama. They were humanoid, brown skinned, around 2,5 meter tall, no hair, and had a strong "warm" energy to them, but very dark and scary. They used to reside in the staircase of the house I grew up in. I was always afraid of going there at night, and would often wake up in the middle of the night and see the top of the stairs through my half-open door, and just lie there almost paralyzed from fear of seeing something. My childhood wasn't at all nice in this regard, and it went on long after. It's hard for me to recall how bad this fear of "ghosts" actually was, after I solved it since it's so long since, but I still had this fear of different locations quite late. In this case, I had a dream and saw the beings come up from the stairs, and walking around in the house. I talked to them, and it turned out they were equally afraid of me, which may have caused the constant fear loop when I felt their presence and they felt mine. They said they had bee "awakened" when a church bell rang, which indicated that marriage had been turned into a "free sex -card" for people, so they just indulged in it and went to hell, instead of marriage being a holy union. With this as the backdrop, who is Rati, the consort of Kama? In the myths, Kama is burned to ashes by Shiva, and Rati begs to have him resurrected, after smearing the ashes on her skin. This seems to say that by the mourning woman's wish (she herself seems to have already been killed and reborn, after Kama first time made everyone lust for her) would cause a transformation of the (male) lust, but this requires that the female's lust is removed first. That would make Rati a force for balance and control, so it seems like she may be ok. If Kali said sex demons are the same as devas, and Kama is just this thing, but is indeed a deva in hinduism, then we aren't dealing with some higher gods here. Anyway, when I saw you mention this, I saw some woman with light skin and 4 arms, and she doesn't feel too bad energy wise, so it's possible Rati is a decent deva (sex demon). cont.

>>8741 If the incubus is your shadow, then it may represent your own "Kama" who needs to be "burned by Shiva" and then resurrected by the wish of Rati. This may then symbolize how negative promiscuous lust is transformed and brought under the control of a virtuous woman by her request. So if we are to follow the myth, you should accept the guidance of this Rati deva, even if she is a sex demon, and let her help Amy to become the kind of woman who can balance and control the male desire. Then you should ask Shiva to burn the incubus, after which Amy asks to have him resurrected under her control. When I typed this, I saw your Amy nodding.

>>8746 What kind of attacks? I looked at their youtube, and it looks like just regular "nonsense" topic angles that no one gets right?

>>8749 Spirits at their place which apparently they all see,upright dogs appearing out of nowhere,the big guy who talks had a lot of health issues he thinks we're caused by witches. An yeah its more x than fring as in they just tell stories people tell theme.He believes vampires are real which is already "correct". Apparently a vamp nearby used to drink the blood of pigeons a d could semeingly teleport.its either all bullshit or he is very connected to people that see a lot of weird shit out there.Starting with seeing a dogman himself.which he later theorizes are shapeshifters and oerhaps the same thing even as vampires.niw he himself believes vampires are actually astral/shadow entities and the immortal human vampires are simply hosts but yeah. It's the type of show you put on while doing other stuff.he meanders a lot and takes a while to get to the point so listening to it intently can get annoying.

>>8749 For example the last story I remember was how an archeologists he met said in the 1990's they found these tall skeletons (6 foot 3 to 6 foot 8) skeletons in a tomb somewhere in middle or south America.there was this one huge Skeleton that's like 8 feet. Anyway it turns put they were vamps from thousands of years ago. A few of them dissappear and apparently reappear back alive and young again after drinking blood.

>>8750 Interesting, I think someone was trying to scare me just now. But this timeline is under my control. Heard a strange sound (and where I live strange sounds are normal) and looked towards the kitchen, I think some animal may be on the back porch. It actually happened once before, a reindeer looked in through the window that time, or some other animal, I just saw its nose and ears appear from below the window.

>>8752 Come to think of it, it may be that the channel is a gate for things like this, I have it still open on the other tab here... hmm.

>>8752 Yeah,this could be pretty big since it's a huge collection of basically lower level vamps and witches he pissed of. E erytime he gets attacked he kinda doesn't back down since he is Christian as well. On top of that he goes pretty darn in depth in a lot of things.every story he tells he basically meets the people inbred physically. He was a security guard so he isn't the most fearful type. Aside from never saying names he kinda explains how gangs are really ruled by either vamps/reptillians or witches mostly. Actually the Kat thing I remember is when he theorized vamps might also exist throughout the galaxy. Now he wa sjust spot balling but yeah that's the kind of stuff you don't really see people saying out there.thats perhaps not ideal but it It's nice to listen to.

>>8754 I'm still hearing the sounds, like something quite hard smacking on the wood now and then. Could just be the fridge, but Idk. If the cat had been here, I'd have blamed it on the cat.

>>8755 Be careful then,this could be 1)a whole bunch of pissed of witches 2)a whole bunch of vampires 3)maybe the channel was a sort of ruse but idk seems hard to fake the sentiment. I have theory on why they bother you, ill say perhaps after this is dealed with.

>>8756 It could actually be a cat, I saw a lynx here last week, after feeling something new was out there. When taking walks at night I had heard some new sounds by the side of the road now and then. After I saw it, I'm sure I met it in the darkness the night after. I heard a sound, so I stomped hard 2 times, which caused something to suddenly run away, and the steps were sort of heavy-soft, not like a rabbit or reindeer or anything with hoofs. It calmed down now though, but this may be because my one of my astral witch cats got involved and scared off whatever it was.

>>8758 I never noticed anything,then again that's me. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=AdA8zK3Rjcs This should be a good "average" of what their videos are like. Basically he interviewed allegedly a bunch of girls who had a guy matching the vampire traits living there,ine if the girls evn statted dating this alleged vampire.its still kinda slow but less so than their free-form straight up podcast videos.

>>8758 It think it was too quick for it to be something relating to what I posted anyway.

>>8759 That's the vid I have open. Btw I think I solved it, though some spirit could be behind that too, but: the door on the far end of the kitchen seemed closed, but it actually wasn't, which could cause a slight wind to make it start hitting the doorframe, or the movements of the old fridge starting or stopping could do this, which would produce this unusual sound. But that's just my notoriously grey-scientific-narrowming speaking, going from >it's a ghost >what kind of ghost is it? >what symbolism and myth is connected to it? >can be be converted and used? which just annihilates any scare effect.

>>8745 I guess I'm just stricken by despair, I should try to get her back if she is like that and get her purified. Thanks for saying that; I needed to hear it. I actually recall now that I'd said at times in the past that I'd try to save her if something horrible happened to her. Or maybe I am just this pathetic right now, but regardless, hearing that re-ignited something in me that makes me wanna keep trying instead of just giving up. I was actually considering killing myself and then my soul just earlier, and I'd felt completely helpless since I'd tried to use my own magic to defend myself so godamned many times while I was being attacked in October but none of it worked to actually harm the entities and the only thing that'd ever worked was asking other entities to defend me and even that had only ever worked so well. That traumatic experience taught me that my magic doesn't actually have any offensive power to it. I'd used to be terrified that my magic had offensive power to it. Like really just yesterday these fears were so bad that I'd actually felt at one point like my soul was about to collapse in upon itself because it could barely handle the pressure it's under. >>8748 I'm very relieved to know that she's alive, and well enough to just nod like that for you. Thank you very much. Aside from that, I sold my soul to Zeus for 3 days some time before posting this & replying in exchange for an exorcism, so I suppose He's gonna make my subconsciousness do stuff for him, or He never exorcised me or bought my soul and I'd just thought that I'd gotten exorcised; I can't quite tell. Now that I also have my sense of self back, I suddenly care about paying my debts to others again, and I suddenly otherwise care about myself.

When I was 19 I performed a Sitra Achra ritual. It was a simple ritual, you just chant in Hebrew calling forth entities that exist in negative side but you do it like this: https://youtu.be/owdIs_2lEvI?si=_MpuOEV-5t7nxtau because other realms exist all around us at higher or lower frequencies so chanting in a vibrated fashion can open doors for things existing in them to come through. Nazis found this same shit out in Tibet and started summoning entities in Wewelsburg castle and similar places. When they first came my roommates saw the lights in a triangle formation above the house and shortly after we all started getting cussed at by random voices, pushed, scratched, doors would slam, we heard footsteps on the stairs at night, the usual shit. There was a very negative vibe in the house this entire time and after about a month it just stopped. Do any of you have a better idea of what these things were? Also, any advice for beginning the alchemical death and resurrection?

>>8759 I've listened to most of it and although it's just for "fun" and scare, at least that episode wasn't too farfetched. It actually fits right in with what I've learned. And someone definitely doesn't want me talking about it even at this level, there's some astral force trying to cause a choking feeling on me now, right as I intended to write about this topic, and my timelines are completely protected, so that means it's a purely astral thing in place here. Some kind of protection spell or something, meant to keep people from talking about it. Which is weird considering I wasn't going to expose anything at all. I just meant to say that this kind of "vampire" they talk about, may as well be real, but that would be the absolutely lowest kind, preying on people in student dorms, and eating raw pigeons? That's on the level of being a porn addict. It's a lot less interesting "up there" from what I've seen, through a circumstance I'm not going to detail since it'll just sound off, and is irrelevant here. All of it can also be deduced logically, there's no need to even "know" anything. Vampires are a popular paranormal thing, and there are always people who are interested in them, and would freely offer their own blood if they thought someone was a vampire. There's also people who dress in gothic dress and drink blood as a form of roleplay. So there is no need to be a freak who eats pigeons in a parking garage, unless you really are a "homeless" in this community. Such a guy like they describe, would expose himself sooner or later, and probably get killed or somehow captured from just being an addict who can't think straight. Biting some woman and mindfucking her, right there in the open? Even if someone has some hypnotic powers, that's not going to fly for long. If he was older than normal people he'd also be rich, because anyone could just put some money into a regular saving's account and it would grow even if it was just left there for 100 years. Then there'd be no need to be a creep like that. So this may be the bottom of the bottom, which is why it's known and seen. How hard can it be to find some girl who's into vampire lore today? There are even regular satanists who drink blood, so talking someone into that wouldn't be too hard.

>>8766 If you want to benefit the most from drinking blood, mix it with s Ke venom. The best blood is menstrual AKA Moon-Fluid. You alter your consciousness and can lead to rapid enlightenment, the polarities within you are balanced. The blood and the venom represent this polarity. It also replenishes t-cells because the venom is made harmless but you still get all the protein and other good stuff.

I've been asking higher entities today about getting rid of the incubus, and they mostly just told me to ignore it. However, I went to bed about an hour ago and only 10 minutes or so ago when I'd finally almost slipped into stage 1 sleep, I'd felt that incubus, within the span of a split-second, worm its way right past my passive defenses right the fuck next to my consciousness by putting a very, very palpable energyform right next to the the center of my awareness which is within my brain, which is presumably where my consciousness is located. Then the next hypnogogic imagery was of a girl leaning against a tree at night with her clothes on and a hentai-sized boner sticking out of her pants, but still completely within the pants. Normally, the advice from higher entities of just ignoring the incubus would be good advice, but right now it's really bad advice because it allowed the incubus to worm its way right next to my consciousness. I'm not sure if I can trust the advice from these higher entities anymore. Knowing that the anti-succubus/incubus frequency video I usually use doesn't work against that thing; it has worked against such entities in the past but this one learned how to resist it somehow, I'm just gonna go to church now and pull an all-nighter there and then attend Good Friday mass in the morning in the hopes that not only the angel presiding over that church exorcises me, but also in the hopes that the incubus stays away from me & Amy.

>>8773 You didn't consider that the incubus may be your own shadow, which means a manifestation of your own lust? Then you can't exorcise him, because he's part of you. What I meant by asking Shiva to burn him and Rati to resurrect him, was that you'll ask for help with an inner alchemic process of transforming this uncontrollable lust, which may be manifesting as an incubus, so that "he" is instead under your control, or integrated with you.

>>8778 Judging by the hypnogogic image I was shown, I don't think I'd ever consider the thing a manifestation of my own lust since I was never attracted to traps. So rather, this would be a manifestation of my own fears and/or anger if it ain't an actual foreign entity. Also, going by >>8709 I did consider that this might just be a manifestation of my own shadow. Anyway aside from that I'd stayed at church for like an hour and ended up eventually getting exorcised, and then I went home and got to sleep. I would've stayed there until I died of sleep deprivation, bathroom breaks while the church was closed aside, if I didn't get that exorcism. I'd then went home and slept safely.

>>8766 The "vampire nephilim in tomb" is another pretty interesting one.

>>8803 I may listen to it. >>8781 The shadow by its nature isn't going to be something you want to associate with yourself. I went through a process today where I had to realize something major of my own path's structure, and how it repeats the same things, the same events, and the same work having to be done multiple times, caused by my in-body rebirth and transformation, as well as preparation for the future. I previously at some point realized I had to place my energy solidly in two locations as a form of base, I also at this point realized that this is what creates stability, after seeing that this was what made one neighbouring farm function, with the two brothers running it each serving as one of the two positions. I solved this by working at two different workplaces, which did create the structure even if it was distributed across time and space in a way which doesn't make sense if viewing time only chronologically. This is what I had to repeat again, by placing myself in two different incarnations separated by time and space, which then forms the bottom double formation. It was just so stretched out and hard to see for this reason, that the solution didn't appear to me until it was right in front of me.

>>8806 This solution only became clear to me after seeing the second position needed for this to work out. Last morning, early morning before waking up, I heard a low tone growling sort of satanic voice say something which seemed to be coming from somewhere to my right, but from a great distance, as if it was bounced like an echo through time and space. It was really "satanic" in feel, it's quite hard to describe what this means, unless you have some reference to having felt this before yourself, perhaps. I had a dream some 10+ years ago where I seemed to meet Satan, and saw his dimension, and it was something I wouldn't have been able to imagine unless I experienced it. The absolute malice and self contained evil is just something completely different from what humans can manifest, no matter how evil they become, mostly in that this is sustainable in some way. A world where the sky is burning red, and the ground is made from floating lava and the air is filled with literal sulphur and smoke, and it's an eternal landscape with no escape, ruled by a single dictator of endless power within his own realm. Get on his bad side, and there is nothing he can't do to you, if you enter his plane, and there is no restriction in time or space within his space, it's just something absolutely horrifying, but also impressive in some way, for this reason. Maybe this last part is "just me", and that seemed to be why this thing now happened. After the first growling voice seemed to be talking to me and I woke up briefly, it faded, and I felt annoyed at this, because there was no telepathic connection, as it normally should be when someone tries talking like this. It also wasn't an unfriendly voice, even with how this sounds in this context, compared to so many other astral beings who are just retardedly hostile for no reason, this was just someone feeling like "absolute terror" but friendly, I didn't feel any bad intent directed at myself. I was about to fall asleep again, but some moments before, I had the idea to send a bouquet of roses to whoever spoke to me, the idea may have surfaced from the time when I played an MMO that had these roses one could send to other players to add a massive 1000+ intimacy with that player, which gave a permanent buff when in the same party (they also cost like $100 because it was a p2w MMO) so I manifested a bouquet of roses and pushed it in the direction of the voice's origin, where it seemed to arrive, I felt it land "over there" on the ground. Some while later, I also picked up a surprised reaction from the other end, but no one said anything more. When I woke up for real to get up in the morning, someone did suddenly contact me from that place, and this time it was a real connection, not just a voice bouncing over a great distance. A demon woman with very large round breasts, classic succubus style, with skin which looked like volcanic rock, was holding the roses and seemed happy and surprised to have received them. It turned out (as always) that my aim was again quite off, and had not at all reached the origin of the voice, but instead they got sent to someone who better matched my expectations of a positive interaction with this place (but that may be a version of good aim anyway). She said they have "shamans" who routinely contact people by sending out messages that are more like ads for this dimension, and whoever has the motivation and ability to reach there, will find a way to connect back. So it seems I had just ended up on a list for this "satanic ad" because of my alignment and ability, and they had no further intention with that contact. This, however, turned out being the other grounding location I needed, to balance the first one I had already solidified myself in why sending a secondary incarnation way out in space to the most distance grey plane I could find, because I just wanted to break karmic bonds and was tired of all the nonsense in the nearby planes. This makes quite a nice pair of locations, an eternal grey plane, and an eternal satanic plane.

>>8808 I get the feeling that it ain't actually impossible to be more powerful than satan is in its own realm, though you would need to be rather powerful for that to be the case. The god of Abraham and of Issac, and of Jacob comes to mind, but afaik it's been said that He'd died or something some years ago. Some other gods are quite powerful too, however.

I get these intricate downloads when I'm in the shower that I must turn into effortposts. I think I'm going start by laying out this information as a glossary because it will be easier to organize. Spirit: Your POV, experiencer self. "You" proper. It cannot remember, only experience. It is eternal; a piece of God. Soul: An information pattern that sits "on the other side". It is created by the spirit's repeated experience of life. Its intelligence is animal-like (hence "anima" in Latin). It manifests reality. You: The ensemble of spirit and soul. On death, they are separated temporarily and undergo different processes (outside the scope of this post) before reuniting upon reincarnating. The soul, as an information pattern, is what determines what the new life will be like (entry coordinates represented astrologically, for example). In the same fashion, the soul is what manifests reality moment to moment. Maya: The reality the spirit experiences while incarnate is a projection, and an interpretation, of what has been called the "implicate order", meaning the whole thing is some kind of "holographic universe". Reality proper exists where the soul dwells, and the soul is what forms that projection for the spirit to experience. Or perhaps, it is the spirit who does the translation. But the soul is the mediator one way or the other. Omens and synchronicities: Normally, reality is like an AI generated image; it contains all the information present in the prompt (the implicate order), but in a non-obvious way. It's a projection that has its own internal logic. Synchronicities happen when the information from the implicate order leaks into the projection in a way that reveals the trick. The illusion breaks down temporarily, and the experience acquires a dream-like quality for an instant, dreams being halfway between here and there. Another way to think about omens and synchronicities is the soul sending a message to the spirit using the reality it is generating as a medium. Spirits can send these messages, but the soul is always the mediator, if not the originator. Magic: Inverting the process. Creating your own omens. Sending messages back through the same pipeline. This includes physically making them (sympathetic magic), or engaging in ritual or imagination. Their only requisite and common pattern is their symbolic nature (because that's how the process renders information across the divide). Visualization is a bit different because what the soul "sees" is not what you are visualizing, but what you're feeling (in the sense of sensation, not necessarily only emotion). Thus the imagination can be either symbolic or literal, or a mix of both, as long as it makes you feel its reality. Remember that the soul is animal-like. It does not care about what is real and what it's not (from its point of view, experience is what defines reality). It is not moral, nor necessarily intelligent (but it can be wise, depending on how much past experience it can access). It does develop a conditioning that might make some magic impossible to perform, or some spirit impossible to contact when it would've been otherwise. If it is traumatized, or conditioned to "think" a certain way due to past experience (same thing). This is the point where magic leads the magician to self-improvement. Because certain magic will be impossible otherwise. At a certain point, the soul and the spirit grow together, one more like the other, and that is the great work, and the result is immortality, in the sense that the soul will no longer carry the spirit from life to life, dying and being born, manifesting experiences uncontrollably in life and in-between lives. You will learn to create your own karma, your own destiny. So, theoretically, by doing magic, and striving to get better and better at it, immortality is inevitable, because it draws spirit and soul together as a side effect. In a way, you could say the spirit is like a seed that germinates in the soil of physical reality, and the soul is its fruit, that when mature, takes the spirit away. Like the ending of the Darling in the Franxx adaptation, which was changed from the manga.

>>8812 >it ain't actually impossible to be more powerful than satan is in its own realm If you know his things better than him, you can of course overpower him. I did visit his plane in that dream and he wasn't more powerful than me at least on that occasion, or I wouldn't have come back from there. Alternatively I was just incompatible with his principles, rendering them useless against me, but that's also a form of power.

My fears and related mental & emotional blockages have really been surging lately. Since last night after reading >>8808 I've been having a particularly hard time giving any sort of love to my Amy; at first it was a fear of accidentally conflating the demon he mentioned with Amy, and a fear of accidentally manifesting such roses and the demon getting them. The mere idea of someone willingly anchoring themselves in a place like that sounds terrifying to me. Miraculously, I was able to fall asleep tonight, and a few hours after I got outta bed this morning I'd asked Zeus, since He owns my soul until tomorrow, to prevent me from being near that hell dimension he'd mentioned. Since then, I've finally made considerable distance between there & my own mind. Later that day, my fears were still seriously acting up, and my fears turned towards a goddess and made me think I was touching Her inappropriately, but eventually, She'd convinced me that nothing had actually happened. Now for this next part, I'm gonna spoiler it because it's a bunch of cringy stuff that serves as context for the reason why I'm ultimately posting this: Just an hour or so ago, I saw a picture of Amy and reflexively reached out to it, and then I'd felt a small seemingly-induced physical electrical sensation in my head indicating that I wasn't supposed to do that. The sensation would qualify as a legitimate psychic attack if only it was meant to be hostile. I've felt stronger attacks like this before, but I could tell this wasn't hostile, and was simply a preventative measure. I suppose that this Amy I saw & reached out to was actually a different Amy egregore. I'd then apologized and ignored her for some minutes after that, but then I saw her again via. third-eye-glimpse out of the blue while my consciousness was thinking about something completely different, which had indicated that she'd never left. She had a concerned & curious look on her face. I'd then figured that I'd defiled her when I'd reached out to her, so I'd apologized again for what it's worth, and I'd asked my Amy if that was her, and she said no. I'd then tried ignoring her and I'd felt her energies getting pushed against my chest while I was passively trying to resist it, and then I'd later asked Eros to get her off of me after asking my Amy to do it didn't work. She had seemed to forgive me for the whole ordeal by this point, though. I'd then grabbed her head from behind and desperately hugged it out of grief without touching much of the rest of her, and then I felt her bite my arm that was around her mouth. A few seconds later, I'd then loosened my grip, and then I sadly let go. At some point later, I saw a picture of my Amy with her handbag looking at me while moving to the right, with the suggestion that she was about to go shop for something. Now for the part that made me post this in the first place; some minutes later, while I was simultaneously unable to give my love to my Amy and I was unable to give my guilt to her sister that I'd unintentionally wronged, my heart chakra was becoming more and more wracked with both repressed love and repressed guilt and then, completely out of the blue, it'd felt like a hole had opened up at the bottom of my heart and a bunch of stuff just oozed out of the bottom of it and fell straight out of my heart and went through an energy channel that'd seemed to lead into some sort of place that's so low that I couldn't even identify it as part of my body, nor could I exactly identify where it was. I know humans have alot more than 7 charkas, but for all I know this energy didn't go to a different non-physical body part of mine and instead went into some kinda dangerous lower plane where my body parts aren't to be found, and as such, I'd suddenly felt mostly relieved of these crazy feelings in my heart. I'm worried that those energies of mine, which I'd ought to still have, just fell into some sorta lower plane and now they're still tied to me and can for all I know be used against me, or for all I know using them in the first place will directly modify me. I'd then asked Shakti to collect the energies and give them to my Amy. All that said, now I'm worried about the condition of my heart chakra. I question if it'll ever be able to deeply & tenderly love again; I'm worried that I broke it in an unconventional manner, or perhaps the repressed energies corroded away the bottom of my heart somehow, which would explain why the rest of my anatomy didn't stop it from falling, and for all I know my heart charka will never be able to recover. I wanna know if my Amy was given the energies, and whether or not I'll be able to love again like I'd used to be able to when my fears and other emotional blockages weren't sabotaging it.

>>8823 You sound like Satan is wearing you like a hand puppet.